I think the whole, "What Would Jesus Do?" phenomena was really owned by people of my age group. We were the ones wearing the bracelets in high school and feeling all awesome.
Well, I didn't. I could never wear those bracelets because I was too terrified of either doing something awful and having it linked to Jesus or of frightening away non-Christians I desperately wanted to be friends with. But it's the first bit I want to talk about today and just that question in general- what would Jesus do?
I don't know if many people read In His Steps, the book that inspired the WWJD? movement, but I had it for required reading in high school and it was part of the reason I was far too frightened to wear that bracelet. I was really uncertain as to what Jesus would do in all manner of situations and so wearing the bracelet would just remind me of all that uncertainty. However, it's still a question that hovers around in my mind all the time. What would Jesus do? So often I find myself praying that, asking God to please, just help me see the truth and know the right thing to do. It's not such a simple question really. It's hard to be certain of what Jesus would do in every situation.
My general rule of thumb is to err on the side of love. What would be perceived as most loving, most open-armed? But then, there are situations like Sara was talking about in her last post where you start to wonder, do I have to keep these toxic people in my life? What would Jesus do? My brain has computed the logical side of the situation I find myself in and has concluded that if a human is bringing more ill than good to my life, I should not associate with them. But... that is much easier said than done because the rest of my consciousness is asking, is that really what Jesus would do? Seems unlikely. He would keep loving them right? Keep welcoming them into his life? Keep in mind, it's not like these people are bringing danger to my life or my husband's life. I don't fear physical harm from them, more just emotional exhaustion. Is it ever okay for someone who claims to follow Jesus to cut someone out of their lives? I feel uncertain. It just... doesn't feel right.
So I'm going to ponder this some more.
oooo, very interesting question to ponder. For me, it's distance. Just as you don't tell everyone every thing about your life; you also would not make everyone your best friend. Some people will naturally be distant, some people will naturally be closer, and I think even those two spectrums have ebbs and flows for people in our lives. When I say I need distance from a person, it's a break for me to determine how close I want to be with someone who is proving beyond my scope of emotions. I have a tendency to want to FIX people, and have developed "close" relationships with people that need actual therapy, not just a good friend. I have had to learn how to establish healthy boundaries, and to say it is ok to NOT be close to everyone I know. It's near to impossible, unless of course you have no other time commitments like working, working out, maintaining a marriage relationship, etc..
ReplyDeleteYou are correct in thinking you never stop loving that person, no matter what. Distance doesn't mean you don't love, distance means space - we all need space in our relationships, no matter how close we get.
There's also understanding that distance means you're allowing the person to be who they are, and allowing you to be who you are without getting irritated at her/him all the time and dwelling on the horrible things she/he says. There's not a quicker way to destroy a relationship and build resentment than to force one's self to continue to stay close to a toxic human. Sometimes the strongest love is to let someone go. Besides, you're so kickass, they generally have no choice but to come back :o)